How to: Vow

Are your vows ‘Unwritten’, are you ‘Staring at the blank page before you?’ well its time to ‘open up the dirty window, let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find’.

OR LET ME HELP YOU…..

Writing vows doesn't have to be stressful, nor should it feel like writing an essay at school! And it certainly shouldn’t take hundreds of hours of reading websites or guides. This is your quick and simple guide to WOW VOWS!

Remember - above all else, be yourself, after all that’s the person your partner LOVES!

Just follow these 4 easy vow-writing steps! 

1. Your Journey

Your love story started somewhere. Tell me what you thought in the beginning (good, bad or funny), give me a throwback to the start of your love story, and then link it to now.

Examples:

Partner, I can’t believe that a late-night Facebook message would result in 6 years of amazing adventures with the girl of my dreams. I am so happy to be marrying you.

The first time I saw you I knew I was in trouble. Trouble because you are drop-dead gorgous, funny, and crazy smart but mostly because you are my best mate’s sister… But as they say, when you know you know. Sorry Benny!

I knew from very early on during our Contiki tour that you were different, I felt so happy around you, and since then, no matter where in the world we are, you still feel like home. I adore you.

They do say mums are always right, and mum always said you were far too good for me and that should lock you down, I am so thrilled I finally am! Just like you, I’ll keep this short and sweet.

I always felt like I was searching for something, even though I was happy something was missing, that feeling of never being finished, uneasy. Then I found you, you were the missing piece to my puzzle. My life is whole with you.

We have changed a lot in the 7 years we have been together, from that shaggy-haired boy and brace face girl, I am so proud of how far we have come. Although, one thing that has not changed is my inability to make decisions. But I can say, without a doubt, marrying you is the best and easiest decision I have ever made.

When we first started dating I would joke you were on probation, well today, I am thrilled to say you have passed with flying colours! Lucky for you, in a few short years, you will be up for long service leave!

You were everything I didn’t know I was looking for at the pub some 4 years ago. Since then, I can’t imagine my life without you and I never want to. I am forever grateful for going out that night and for the liquid confidence that got me on the dancefloor.

You always say I get what I want, and today standing in front of you about to become your wife is proof of that. We have grown so much from those two kids who met at high school to the (only slightly) grey adults we are today. 

2. What do you love?  

There is no doubt 1000 + 1 reasons you want to marry this person, and you will have your whole lives to tell each other! Share with us a few of the main things you love about your partner. You can even wrap them up in a story or memory you think portrays them well.

Examples:

You are not only the most beautiful specimen I have ever laid my eyes upon, but you are also the most thoughtful and kind person I know. I am so lucky to start and end my days with you.

You are everything I have ever dreamt of and more. You’re kind, caring nature and maybe your nice teeth and cool Subaru Liberty drew me in all those years ago but your loyalty, charisma, and positive outlook on life made me stick around.

Partner, I admire your commitment to our family and our dreams, you bring so much joy and happiness into my life. With you by my side, I feel like I can achieve anything.

You are beautiful inside and out. You light up any room you are in. The depth of love you have for your friends, family, and any animal that crosses your path is intoxicating and when you break it down, I think I love that about you the most, you have the most vibrant soul.

People wonder why I call you my Labrador, and it isn’t for obvious reasons. Yes, you run to the door when I get home, bring a ball on every single one of our walks, and must stop to talk to every single person in sight but it’s more than this. The joy you promote each day. This is what I love most about you, your infectious energy and zest for life.

To this day you STILL give me butterflies. I love that with one look you know exactly how I am feeling and you always know how to make me smile.

There is so much about you that I admire, from your kindness, your generosity, and your selflessness – you are truly the most incredible person I know. I love how patient you are, even when I test your limits. I love how much fun you make every day, even the most mundane of days. I love how safe you make me feel, how you always push me to be brave, and how you always make me feel loved. Any day with you by my side, is by far my favourite kind of day.

I admire your work ethic and commitment to our goals. I love your shower-singing voice, kitchen dance moves, and sleeping face but most of all your heart and how it loves me. You may always be late, but you are always worth the wait.

3. What do you vow/promise?

They are called ‘vows’… so you gotta make some promises! Try to include a combination of serious and playful but make sure they are ALL specific to you and your partner. No ‘I vow to honour and obey’, ew.

Examples:

I promise to fall asleep holding your hand every night and pretend your feet aren’t iceblocks. I will cherish you every day, support you in all that you do, and always put us first. I vow always to be your shoulder to cry on, your loudest supporter, and your soul to rest with. 

I vow to always laugh at your cheesy jokes and resist the urge to break your Call of Duty games. I promise to always listen to you, compromise, and never go to sleep angry. I promise to tell you I saw your wave, even though it was probably another surfer. No matter what challenges come our way we will face them as a team. I will love your family as my own and always put our family first. 

I vow to reduce my time spent on laborious hobbies (golf and triathlons) and complain a little less during the upcoming seasons of Selling Sunsets, MAFS, and the Block; and to change and grow with you always for the better, prioritizing our relationship whatever comes our way.

I can’t promise I will remember to replace the toilet roll, bin bag, or milk but I can promise to always make sure you know how loved and cherished you are and to always make you feel safe.

I will love and support you every day even if it means letting you watch golf and go for 3 hours of surfing. I vow to always be a team and never take our life together for granted. No matter how many years pass, I promise to always keep our relationship fresh and exciting. However, I can not promise this will not involve annual holidays and new hobby toys. 

I promise to return the coffee in bed, to make you laugh (because we know I am the funny one), to tease you for the way you meticulously stir pasta sauce, and definitely not listen when you start complaining that I’m making you watch Bridgerton for the 5th time.

I vow to never shoosh you when you are singing in the shower and always give you 80% of the doona. I promise to love you loyally and without reservation no matter the challenges that come our way and to try to make you laugh every day.

I promise to try and act interested when you are showing me your golf/ cricket/ boxing swing and continue to smile and nod when you talk about your ‘handicap’. At least pushing a golf cart has been good practice for a pram. I promise to be by your side supporting you, pushing you, celebrating with you, and growing with you through all chapters of life. I promise to always make you feel as comfortable and secure as you make me and to be a feeling of home, no matter where we are.

I vow to listen to your vents when you get home from work and you talk to me on the phone when your bored of driving. I will always wash up, as long as you’re cooking, and make sure we have Shiraz in the cupboard. I promise to make sure you know every day how truly beautiful you are and how much better my life is for having you in it. 

4. Now close it.

Wrap the whole thing up with something from the heart. End with the sentence that is forever, a final message, a sign-off, and maybe use your pet name, a saying you use often, or a movie quote you love. Make sure it feels like YOU!

Examples:

Honey, you mean more to me than the Knights and Swans combined. You are my yesterday today and all of my tomorrows. I love you.

Finally, I’ll vow to do anything to make you happy, even if that means finishing off renovations that I started back in 2015 or embarrassingly dancing with you in front of approximately 90 of our closest friends and family tonight.

I chose you on the day I met you in 2012, and if I had my time again, I would find you and I would choose you again. I can’t wait to grow old and wrinkly together. You have my heart, always.

Through the sunshine and the rain, through your Gilmore Girl obsession and all the seasons of our life, together forever, you and me. I love everything about you and always will.

Today I enter this marriage without a single ounce of hesitation or doubt. I know that the years to come are going to be filled with so much love, adventure, and happiness and I can’t wait to continue our lives as husband and wife.

To borrow the words of Luke Combs, ‘Yeah, she's crazy, But her crazy's beautiful to me’. You are, in every sense of the word, beautiful to me.

I am so grateful to be the subject of your love and I promise, vow, and commit to loving you… always.

And when we are 90 years old and grey, having watched our children and grandchildren grow up, I hope you turn to me, grin, and say, 'That was so much fucking fun'.  

I am so proud of all we have already achieved together and all that is yet to come. Your beaming smile can brighten even the worst of days and I can’t wait to wake up to it every morning.

To continue to do the little things, to make you happy. Because seeing you happy makes me the happiest girl in the world and I think that's a pretty damn good way to begin a marriage.

If I had my time again the only thing I would change is to have met you sooner, because forever with you won’t be long enough.

I love you more than all the reality TV combined and there is no one I would rather scroll TikTok next to than you. I will always love you without restraint because you are the holder of my heart.

You are my best friend in the whole world and as Winnie the Pooh once said “If you live to be 100, I hope to live to be 100 minus one day, so I never have to live without you”.

I vow to spend early mornings and dinner dates with you. And on the nights when we stay home, I vow to always open the ‘good wine’ even if it is on a Tuesday… because life is short and our time together is worth celebrating.

Still struggling?

Book Steph as your celebrant and she will help you! ;)